I agree that there are certainly crazy mothers, but that doesn`t always lead to the girl`s behavior. The generalization that “young women today are arrogant and justified” is very far removed and with which I strongly disagree. Thanks for sharing. Everything you said touched my heart. I am so sorry to hear that even your “well-meaning friends” have persuaded you to tolerate this kind of behaviour. Cuddles. You are a strong woman. Surround yourself with those who truly love you and know the truth. Beware of a wolf in sheep`s clothing. Often abuses take the form of Christian leadership, which is not based on the Bible at all, but on their views and cultural practices.
I just want to thank you for this article. I`m experiencing that right now. My mother is the monster mother-in-law, and point by point, that`s exactly what my wife is experiencing. She has, like you, a wonderful mother who is a great stepmother to me. I feel bad that my wife doesn`t have the same experience, but I have accepted that there is nothing I can do but support my wife and help her keep her distance. I feel sorry for everyone who is going through this. The courts are gender-biased against mothers and there are miles of research done over the past decade to support this. Joan Meier is a respected lawyer who has written extensively on the subject.
Richard Gardner`s debunked theory of parental alienation by mothers claiming that violence is always used as if it were fact, although it is more or less simply described as “not encouraging to the children`s relationship with their father,” and its abuse is ignored because, although observed through the eyes of the court throughout the litigation, “showed great growth” or whatever made-up jargon they use to erase your story. Question: My mother-in-law refused to talk to us when we tried to set our boundaries regarding our children, and my husband sided with me. But I feel like my husband is very worried about that. Should I talk to him again and find a compromise? But the mother-in-law made a lot of rude comments before the ceremony and plugged in her boot, shortly after the Dora ceremony, there are a lot of support groups I found, at least online, especially on Instagram and FB. Some of the best I`ve found and others that offer healing and abuse recovery programs. You`re not alone, you`re not crazy, and you need to have a fixed plan or an M.O. to live with it. The other person will not change, despite occasional signs or manifestations of a healthier predisposition. This doesn`t last and is more likely to prepare you for further injuries. May God bless you and wish you the best! The problem with his mother is one that probably existed long before you entered the scene. Let them find out. I know you`ve probably had a conflict about the situation, even feeling guilty or responsible.
Not to tell you how to feel, but – don`t! It is not for you to decide; It`s not your fault. Not even your fiancé`s. Issuing an ultimatum is one of the oldest manipulative tricks in the book to force someone to comply. Your fiancé opposes his mother and refuses to be manipulated. If you`re thinking, “My mother-in-law is manipulating my husband and children,” it`s not really about you. The abuse simply wasn`t based solely on pornography. It escalated to almost everything. Not just between him and me. It was also between me and him and his family members.
My NDE is one of the most evil jobs you will ever see I have been with my husband for 17 years and she has not loved me for 17 years, nor my husband SIL, she has nothing nice to say about me or my husband, but she has lived with us for 12 years, the only child, that she loves is her latest born and needless to say that she loves her wife and child, but unfortunately the feelings are not mutual, she will never do it and will ask him to always do it in her own way or in no case, whether with kitchen cleaning or with my daughter, Her daughter can`t live with her, so she was with my husband and me and honestly, I don`t know how much abuse I can still endure It`s like a cult. If you gas them publicly, they can`t hurt you, they fear you and what you can do, even if you hide their abuse from the public, you have to put on a big show so they can`t touch you. Because if you keep it to yourself, they will run their mouths and ruin your reputation and social skills because you dared to protect yourself from their abuse, their self-worship, their religion against “them.” When I started talking about the abuse, his family didn`t like it and they started blaming me. They would say, no, it`s you. You have a large mouth; They talk too much. He`s a great person. I agree. My mother-in-law gives me sneaky compliments and insults me, but as a woman whose children are almost adults, I would like to help my children in this way and I would be sad if they thought my motives were not true.
Anne: Before I go any further; This is a very common thing that victims are accused of. To try to hurt or ruin the life of their abuser. The only reason you say these things is to damage his reputation or his life, and that`s not true. So it`s a very common thing that abusers say to try to keep their victims silent. What do you really do when your wife`s mother is her best friend and I dare say just a friend? She comes to your house every week, stays in the kitchen or living room from morning to night! When my brother or cousin enters the kitchen, she walks in like she`s looking for something! As a result, my own brothers and sisters no longer come to my house no matter the occasion. I barely hang around the house myself when she`s around, and she`s there almost every week. My wife and I had an argument one day and out of frustration, I told her that her only friend was her mother! She got angry, left and complained to mom and came back after 3 days. What amazes me is that whenever my in-laws are around, they can talk non-stop from morning to night! I`m just tired of it all and I don`t really know what to do.
And to add to that, my wife is not my parents` best friend. How can I manage this? Dealing with an abusive mother-in-law is stressful and unfair, but by communicating with your spouse and setting healthy boundaries, you can hopefully improve the situation. Work with your spouse to set boundaries so that their mother`s abusive behavior doesn`t affect you as much. For example, you might agree not to leave her alone with your children or walk away from the situation if she starts insulting you. If your mother-in-law crosses a line with you, be polite but assertive to her by saying something like, “I don`t appreciate being addressed like that.” You can also limit your contact with your mother-in-law so that you only have to deal with her in rare cases. If you are stressed about having to see your mother-in-law soon, take some time to relax and prepare for the visit to be calmer and more collected. For more advice from our co-author, including what to do if your spouse denies abuse, read on. My mother-in-law stays with us.
She continues to make the worst comments in the house, to the point where I really can`t take it anymore. She really doesn`t do much at home because we don`t want her to really do anything either, but not everything I do is for her Stangarde or not in the time she wants to do.